Overcoming the Stress

With the passing of time, so passes the stress. Where did it go, I wonder? Methinks it will return before the end of the month, which is the due date of one of my deadlines. As I said in the previous post, deadlines are important. Motivates a person.

I knew things were turning around when I started to think clearer, and think actual analytical thoughts about my project. Prior to this, I was thinking the plodding thoughts. I was caught up in the minutia and worried about filling the pages with facts. I broke from the stress of the work by putting off the analytical thoughts until more pages came. So, that has been helpful. Another thing that has helped is my class. I teach a women's history course and this term it deals primarily with women and religion. We begin with methodology and asking questions about why we need to consider religion and women together (Thank you Ann Braude!). This has brought my own thoughts into focus. The trick of course it to transfer the intellectual excitement of class to writing. (Same thing happens after I go to a conference. If I could only bottle that enthusiasm...)

So, I am thinking again about the whys of the project and not solely about the hows. Yes, we can easily figure out how things happened and chronicle that, but if we can add the why it did, then there will be something all together worthwhile. I also need to consider why this study is important. It is funny when sparks of good ideas come to me. I look back at a good passage and think, "where did that come from? Did I really write that?" Usually when I do not think too much about every, little word, then good things come.

Does this translate to the other corners of my life? Probably would if I stopped obsessing on the other stresses in my life.

Stress

I have and always will be a bit wound tight. I am a worrier. I operate with a level of stress of my own making. I tend to work better under pressure. Deadlines are a great motivator. Left to my own devices, I tend to wander, meander, lolly gag, dawdle. So, I have never truly felt bad about the amount of stress in my life. I have been told I need to deal with my stress level, find a way to not give in to my worries. I have not ignored these directives and I do try to deal with stressful situations, but then again I do not. I do nothing to really change how I operate. That is all fine for the every day stress.

Then there is STRESS. The big, giant, hardly manageable stress that can stop me in my tracks. This stress can take any amount of motivation and mind-over-matter attitude and flush it down the toilet. And that is where I am now. I have large and important to my future work (not in the grand scheme of important work, but to me important) to do in a short amount of time. If I am to do what is right, wise, prudent even, to have "wisdom to see what is virtuous, or what is suitable or profitable," I need to manage this stress.

Enough meandering, the stress will be managed by a healthy amount writing. We need results, not lolly gagging!

A New Year and What is My Role Here?

Since the New Year has begun, I have not had a chance to take note of it and think about any sort of resolutions or meditate on the world around me. Well the world outside of my own little world. As a result, two things have popped into my mind. First, what is the point of my writing on this blog? and second, do I pay attention enough to warrant writing a blog?

What is the point of having a blog that is more or less a series of musings on my personal life or events of my day, particularly if they have no relevance on the wider world? Do I have anything pertinent to say about the political and cultural world around me? I know I have nothing to say about the economic world, that is for sure. (Historian here; I have passing understanding of how the economy works.) To be frank, I tend to turn off the news or strongly encourage (read nag) my Beloved Husband to do so if he has the clicker. I do not want to watch any of the cable news shows; I barely want to pay attention to the local news. I like weather. Of course, who doesn't? A good discussion of the forecast can capture my attention more than the state of the economy. The world news and the state of the wars in which we are engaged breaks my heart. I do not know what to do with that. So, I turn on Home and Garden TV or watch another rerun of NCIS.

So, I have nothing to say about politics, both international, national, or local. I dare not comment on the economy for fear of scorn. I have no philosophical training beyond PH 101 and two other classes that had more to do with American history than philosophy. How many times can I comment on the weekly sermon (which was excellent this week by the by)? Should I talk about television programs I like? Beloved Husband is OFF LIMITS.

Now that leaves work. I cannot get too much into a discussion of my work for two reasons. One, I am a struggling historian/adjunct and if for some crazy reason someone for whom I work or teach actually reads this blog, they will know about which I am speaking. Second, I conduct research on a very little corner of the history and well, we know who we are. (Or am I being vain or presumptuous? Do other scholars in my field know who I am? Do not want to know the answer to that question.) So, I must confine myself to the process and not the content of my work. Hm.... How many readers do we have?

And so we are back at the beginning. Why should I write on a blog? Well, it is a new year. I will not throw in the towel just yet. Maybe I will figure this whole thing out and find a reason for continuing. So, loyal (raised eyebrow) reader(s), stay tuned. We here at Perfection of Prudence may surprise you.